


Yuri knew he was in trouble...

by Ashratherose



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alpha Victor, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Knotting, M/M, Masturbation, More tags to be added, Omega Yuuri, Omegaverse, Retirement, Secrets, Sex, Slow Build, idk it's 4am and in writing porn, oh sweet baby jesus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-13
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-09-08 10:07:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8840455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashratherose/pseuds/Ashratherose
Summary: In a world where people's second nature doesn't manifest until they've met their mate Yuri struggles with the realisation that the man he's idolised for years may just be the one destined for him.





	1. Chapter 1

Yuri knew he was in trouble the moment Victor had arrived.

*  
December 18 2005

Yuri was buzzing! It was the last day of Grand Prix in Tokyo, and Minako had brought him as a late birthday present. She knew the kid had had a tough year.

She's seen the bruises and realised before anyone else something was wrong. They'd covered the lower part of his back which would usually been out of sight, only Yuri had been stretching at the time and his shirt had ridden up.

He'd flinched when she called him out on it. Even as a small kid he'd always tried to hide his pain, but this time she needed to know the truth.

Yuri had broken down as he admitted he was being bullied at school and that they'd pushed him down the stairs for no good reason. 

Even from a young age he'd always been a sweet kid, always kind to everyone and never nasty at all. She'd wondered how anyone could think it was ok to hurt him!

And so now they were seated together watching the figure skaters together. She loved the way Yuri's eyes would light up as he watched every move. She let herself be swept away in the moment too.

She'd missed the way Yuri's face had grown redder and redder like he was coming down with a fever, the way he'd started to wriggle in discomfort, in fact she would have been oblivious to the whole situation if he hadn't started crying.

People were staring at Yuri. Minako could hear them whispering about the upset boy as he lead him out to the lobby. By now his breath was falling in short pants and his steps uneven.

The boy stumbled and Minako went to catch him, her hand brushed against his damp arse and he moaned with discomfort. Wanting to spare him the shame she'd handed him her jumper to wrap around his waist. If he'd wanted to go to the toilet why hadn't he just gone? 

Leading the still sobbing Yuri out the gymnasiums door she had to all but catch Yuri as his legs gave out again. She started to actually panic now. The kids body was burning up.

Hailing a taxi she had the driver take them both to the nearest hospital.

As the nursing staff had lead Yuri away the kid hadn't calmed down any. She threw herself down into an uncomfortable green chair to wait. This wasn't how she'd seen today going at all.

She was beginning to get frustrated just as they finally came to get her.

Walking into the examination room she frowned. Yuri was now in a set of scrubs, seated on the bed he stared at him feet.

Sitting down she wasn't ready for what she was told next. Yuri had gone into heat. The boy was an omega.

She moaned and face palmed. 

She knew people only presented after meeting their mates and wondered where the hell Yuri could have met his. The only place they'd been was the hotel and the gymnasium and Yuri had been just fine this morning. So that meant gymnasium. 

Yuri was still looking at his feet as the nurse discussed details with her. They'd given Yuri a dose of suppressants for now and a few extra tablets to take home that were only to be used until then. Once home he was to let his first heat happen and then make a doctors appointment.

As they left the hospital Yuri still wouldn't look at her, he was clearly struggling with it all and Minako felt like shit, though she quickly scolded herself it wasn't like she'd known this would happen.   
She felt a rising curiosity about who Yuri's fated mate could be... was it one of the skaters? 

*  
Yuri was quiet the who way back, every now and then he'd open his mouth to say something but soon stopped again realising he didn't know what to say. All thorough school he'd been told presenting your secondary dynamic was as amazing but all he felt was embarrassed and disgusted.

He knew Minako felt bad about everything and wanted to tell her it was all ok, but he just felt too shitty.

He all but dived into the shower when they'd arrived back at hotel room. He heard Minako yell out she was going out for a bit and he breathed out a sigh of relief. His body still felt gross and it was awkward feeling so feverishly aroused around Minako.

As the hot water cascaded down his back he wondered about who his mate could be... where they feeling just as frustrated as he was right now? 

*  
Yuri's parents fussed over him the second he got home. He knew they meant well but all he wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep till it was all over.

When he finally did escape he locked himself in. He was so ashamed of the sensations he was feeling and there was no way he wanted for his family to see him like this.

Stripping down he all both fell onto his bed, enjoying the coolness of the sheets against his fevered skin. If this was how it felt with suppressants he didn't want to know how much worse it would get.

By the next morning he was a whimpering mess. He'd tried hard not to give into what his body wanted, to not touch himself but he couldn't help it, he felt like he would literally die if he didn't. When his mother had knocked on the door he thought of how she knew what he would be doing and wanted to die right then and there.

*  
7 days. 7 days he was in heat and it had been hell. His bed was a disgusting mess and stank of semen and sweat. He sympathised with male omegas worldwide.

He went to his first appointment alone, he was so ashamed by the answers he may have to give that he couldn't ask anyone to come. 

The doctor was friendly enough and reassured him that he'd dealt with omegas before and had nothing to fear. It did nothing to help his nerves but he appreciated the sentiment. 

Yuri felt like he'd never talked about himself so much before in his life. The doctor had asked everything from his childhood through to his life ambition. He was going to be a figure skater.

Everyday for the rest of life he'd have to take suppressants... well until the time he and his mate finally decided to start a family at least.

*  
In 2010 he moved to the US to chase his dream, only chasing that dream was harder than he imagined.

Even with suppressants it seemed everyone knew he was an omega. Alpha after alpha would approach him and each time he was left to wonder why they weren't with their own mates.   
He hated the attention.   
He just wanted to be normal.

Eventually he finally made it to the Grand Prix. He'd worked so hard for it only to fall apart at the crucial moment. The moment he'd met the other skaters he knew one of them was his destined one. The suppressants he'd taken for years seemed to stop working over night and his body betrayed him. He tried to ignore it but his pitiful display on the ice destroyed him. He was wracked with guilt, he failed everyone.

In the end he decided he needed to break away from America and rethink if he'd chosen the right path. He couldn't keep skating if this was going to happen every time he had to compete on an international level.

He'd also decided to stop taking suppressants. It had been years and it wasn't like I would see his mate around here?

And so he'd finally arrived home.

*  
Minako had been clearly shocked by his weight gain and Yuri couldn't help but be self conscious about it. Ever since he'd stopped with the suppressants he'd found it almost ridiculously easy to put weight on. He hated it. To him it was just another sign he was an omega, and destined to be a stay at home mum to his alphas children. 

*  
Arriving at the Ice Castle he'd been relieved to find Yuko working. Before he'd presented he'd had such a huge crush on her, the fact that he was an omega not destined for her had hurt more than he cared to admit. He knew she'd already found her mate but part of him still hoped there was some mistake.

"Stay with me" was his gift to her. He'd lost track somewhere along the way and realised skating was no longer fun, not like how it had been when they were brats. He'd missed so much of her life and hoped this small token would make up for a little of the pain he was sure he'd caused her. He never imagined her triplets would be filming.

He never imagine that her triplets would be filming and then uploading it to YouTube for the whole world to see. He was beyond embarrassed. Victor Nikiforov was his idol! Hell he was pretty much everyone's idol and possessed a skill set Yuri could only dream of!

He never imagined that a video of his poor imitation would actually result in the Russian flying over. 

He never imagined that Victor Nikiforov was the alpha destined for him and yet the universe had other plans.


	2. 2

Seeing Victor naked in the outside bath had been too much to handle. The second he'd laid eyes on him Yuri realised he was in trouble.

He all but ran to Minako's. She was the only one who had been there from the start. She'd been there for his first heat and he knew he could trust her now.

His body was burning with fever by the time he find himself knocking on her door. She'd laughed at first teasing him gently about how "that's what happened when you let yourself go" it wasn't until she actually took him by the arm and felt the burn of his skin she realised what was going on.

Helping Yuri in she seated him down on the sofa in her small lounge area. 

Yuri's body was shaking and his mind screamed that he should be by Victors side. He wanted to sink into the sofa and disappear forever. What did a skating elite like Victor do to end up with a mate like him. Instead of being thrilled like he'd dreamed he would be (when he finally met his mate), he was terrified. Terrified he'd be an awful omega.  
Terrified Victor wouldn't want him.  
Terrified Victor would see how unappealing he truly was.  
His chest heaved as he started to sob.

*  
Minako tried her best to calm Yuri down. As far as she knew he should be on suppressants and not experiencing his current heat. She'd never been a soft soothing person but still tried to convince Yuri to calm down.

Pulling out her phone she stepped out the room. She was getting nowhere fast so she called Mari.  
She almost died on the spot as Mari filled her in about Victors arrival, thanking Mari she hung up.

Victor was in Japan to coach Yuri?  
And now Yuri was suddenly in heat?  
She'd already put 2 and 2 together but she couldn't understand why Yuri had worked himself up into such a state... especially not when she knew how much Yuri had admired Victor.  
Sighing she reminded herself to keep a cool head and returned to Yuri's side.

*  
Yuri had calmed down for the most part and though his lip still trembled and the occasional sob would break his sentence he tried to do his best as he filled Minako in on the situation.

He watched as her expression alternated between slight concern and looking like she'd burst out laughing at any moment. This hadn't helped at all. It wasn't until she realised he'd stopped talking and started glaring that she finally replied.

She found his concerns funnyand reminded him that Yes Victor may be a skating god fate had decided they belonged together, so there was no point arguing with it and maybe he should just give things a try. It wasn't like Victor had done anything wrong, hell he was probably back at Yu-topia feeling just as confused.

He nodded. Logically her words made sense but years of bullying had left him feeling so broken he'd put his walls up and now didn't know how to let anyone in. 

Yuri shifted uncomfortably. He could feel himself growing slicker. He didn't now if it was because he was talking about Victor or just from the heat in general. 

Minako didn't miss the subtle wiggle of clear discomfort and disgust. She could remember Yuri's first heat like it was yesterday. She asked Yuri if he had any suppressants at home but he could only shake his head miserably.

She sighed and felt even worse again... he'd inconvenienced her more than he intended. Rising from the sofa he had the intention of leaving, he shouldn't have come... he should have just found some small spot and locked himself away. 

He tried to stand but found he had almost no strength, immediately falling back down onto the sofa. He felt the slick spread and dissolved into a fresh round of tears.

*  
Minako realised Yuri wanted to bolt even before he tried to stand, she found herself relieved when he collapsed back. Just because there were plenty of mated alphas out there didn't mean it was safe to send Yuri home like this.

Pulling out her phone she scrolled down until she found the listing she was looking for and hit call.

Yuri didn't realise but Minako was actually calling in a personal favour for him right now. One of the girls she taught was actually the daughter of a local physician. 

When he finally answered she didn't even give him time to say hello before launching into a quick summary of the current situation. It only took a few minutes to organise for him to come out and take a look at Yuri right now. He'd also promised to bring some suppressants for Yuri. 

She let out a small sigh of relief, the situation was finally calming and would soon be under control.

*  
Yuri hadn't even noticed the doctors arrival. He was curled up on his side trying his hardest to ignore what his body was begging for. He felt Minako shake his shoulder and it took him a minute to realise she was saying she'd be right outside if he needed her.

Nodding he'd scrunched his eyes closed only to jump when he heard an unfamiliar voice call his name.

He was sure the doctor had introduced himself but he'd completely missed that bit. Instead he found himself being gently guided into a sitting position.

"Yuri I'm going to give you an injection now to help calm you down and then I'm going to ask you some questions ok?"

He nodded before feeling the sharp prick of the needle as it was slid into his arm. It seemed to take forever to feel any affect. Even then all it really did was help calm his thoughts, his body still burnt.

Sitting there he answered all he could about the brand and dosage of his previous suppressants.   
Next he was asked about how long he'd taken them for, when his last heat was and when he'd first presented. The doctor nodded in sympathy.  
Finally came the question about why was he in heat now?

He forced back the tears... well he tried but soon he found himself sobbing out the same story he'd told Minako.  
The doctor moved and wrapped one arm around Yuri's shoulders, obviously trying to comfort him.

They talked about skating and the fact his mate would be by his side pretty much 24/7 until the years end. This lead to a discussion about the effects various suppressants would have on his body.

The doctor seemed to understand his concern and assured him it was normal to want to get to know his mate first before anything happened. Yuri thought about how he'd wanted Minako to reassure him exactly he way the doctor just had.

After a few more back and forth questions Yuri opted for a rod. It would be implanted into his left upper arm and give a high level slow release dose of suppressants and contraceptives.   
The doctor had brought it with him as a "just in case" item and was able to insert it then and there.

He also gave Yuri another shot of suppressants and tablets to take until the symptoms started to die down.

Yuri thanked him and was given a clinic card. He was asked to come in in two weeks time for a follow up to make sure everything was alright. Yuri thanked him again before asking about payment for tonight, he smiled a little as he was told Minako would be footing the bill.

*  
Even though she'd only talked with the physician for a few minutes when she walked in Yuri was fast asleep on the sofa. She winced imagining how gross he would feel tomorrow. Seeing it wasn't to late she changed and headed out, leaving a note for Yuri that she was heading over to Yu-topia to have a few drinks and get him some cloths. She also stated that he should just go ahead and take a shower in she wasn't back by the time she returned.

*  
Even in his dreams he couldn't escape Victor. He dreamt Victor had realised he was a worthless omega and had gone back to Russia. It replayed on repeat over and over until he woke up to find himself sobbing.

He reached out feeling for his glasses, it seemed the second injection had finally kicked in and he was feeling a lot more normal than before. 

Looking down at the table his eyes fell on the note Minako had left him. His sense of guilt swelled again. He didn't deserve people's kindness. Not a weak omega like him. He went to rise from the sofa and realised just how sodden he'd become down there. He couldn't walk home like this.

Stripping in Minako's bathroom he felt like he was intruding. His face burnt with embarrassment even though the apartment was empty.

Standing in the shower he awkwardly cleaned the slick away. It felt so very wrong to be touching himself like this but still forced himself to endure it until he'd cleaned away all the slick and precum he could. He'd panicked for a second when he'd stepped out the shower before realising Minako had left him a folded towel on the small vanity.

He dried as fast as he could before realising he didn't really have anything to change into. His underwear was totally ruined and his pants weren't far off. Sighing he fished around in his jacket pocket until he found his phone.

Minako had sent him a few texts asking if he was awake yet. He sent her a quick reply only to receive a picture message in return. She'd snapped a candid shot of Victor. Yuri couldn't help but be annoyed and reminded her he was now stuck in her bathroom waiting on clothes. 

It was another half hour before she messaged back saying she was on her way.


	3. 3

His butt has long since gone numb and he'd started to drift off by the time he heard Minako knock on the bathroom door. Moving away from it she passed the bagged bundle through the small gap.

As Yuri pulled out the bundle he realised something else and was mortified. She'd touched his underwear. She would have had to actually open the draw to pull a pair out. Once again he cursed being an omega.

Bundling up his dirty clothes he stuffed them into the bag before stepping out the bathroom.  
Walking back into the lounge he apologised for all the inconvenience and thanked her for her help. Sliding on his shoes he bid her goodnight and left.  
It wasn't until he was half way home he realised he'd left the doctors card at Minako's house. He made a mental reminder to ask for the details tomorrow.

*  
His arm was stinging and he felt sick by the time he got home. The first thing he did was dump the dirty clothes in the washing machine. When it was finally thudding away he went in search of his mother.

His mother was still cleaning up after the customers. He went to help but was told to sit while she made him something to eat. She'd offered to make his favourite: an extra large pork cutlet bowl. Any other time he would have said yes but he didn't think his stomach could handle it right now so instead asked for some toast.

While his mother cleaned she filled him in on his Victor seemed such a lovely man and how thrilled she was he was here now. Yuri tried not to choke on his toast.

When she was done he took over the conversation and gave her a full run down of the nights events.

To hear that Victor was Yuri's mate seemed to make her ecstatic and Yuri wondered just how Victor could have won her affections so fast.

When he was done he kissed her cheek and excused himself back to his room. Just before he fell asleep he prayed that it had all been a dream.

*  
It was still dark when Yuri awoke. His whole body was bathed in fiery fever and was demanding he be mated. Weakly he snaked a hand out from under the blankets 3:28am. That meant roughly 7 hours had passed since the suppressants injection.

Realising the bottom of his phone felt damp he shone its weak screen light on the bedside table. His mum must have been in his room at some point because a bottle of water was sitting there, its precipitation was what had leaked down onto his phone.

Reaching out he grabbed the bottoms and the foil blister packet of suppressants before popping 2 and downing them with the water.

He was trying desperately to ignore how painfully hard he was. His boxers already felt damn. Pushing away the blankets he let out a small moan as the cold night air engulfed his skin.

He knew that he'd have to face a heat at least once while living here but he hadn't counted on it being so damn soon.

Pulling down his boxers he gasped coldness assaulting his erection. 

Katsuki Yuri soon to be 24 and masturbating in his bedroom like a teenager all over again.

As he ran one hand down his chest he almost came immediately, it only took a few gentle strokes to bring himself to completion. His face burnt with embarrassment. He was so glad no one would ever know.

He'd been hoping cuming at least once would take the edge off but all it did was seem to make him even more aroused. He could feel the slick running down his thighs now and I wanted to run and jump on Victor and beg for his alpha to take him. 

Only he couldn't.  
Wouldn't.

Ignoring the fact he was a dripping mess he forced himself out of bed and started looking through the box of things he'd had sent over from America. He knew what he was after.

Essentially it was a vibrator designed for omegas. At the base there was a small button which an omega could push and cause the part inserted to swell in imitation of knotting.

He'd brought it America because the idea of ordering a sex you and having it sent to his family home mortified him beyond belief. Hell he'd only brought it as an "encase of emergency" sort of thing.

Sliding it out the plastic packaging he wouldn't help but feel pathetic and embarrassed.

Katsuki Yuri soon to be 24 and using a vibrator in his family home while they all slept.

He forced himself to calm down. If he wanted to get any sleep tonight he'd definitely need to take the edge off.

Laying on his bed he twisted off the bottom so the battery compartment slid out. 4 AAs. Right he could do that. Rolling over he winced in pain as he half rolled on to his erection. Idiot. Still he forced himself to lay there so he could fossick through his bedside draw for batteries.

Sliding the batteries in he tried to stop his shaking hands. 

Finally he rolled back onto his and bent his knees up. He took a deep breath and slid the toy straight in.

The pain nearly made him cum again. He knew he was supposed to loosen himself up before hand but he was already so slick and wet he'd figured it would slide right in.

His mind screamed at him to thrust down and take it deeper. Experimenting he gently slid it in and out until his found his sweet spot, it was only then that he twisted it on.

Yuri saw stars. Flashes of red and white danced across his vision and a loud needy moan escaped from his parted lips. This was the first time he'd ever done anything like this. His body felt like it was melting. Leaving the toy in place he ran his fingertips over his body, stopping every so often to tweek his nipples or gently jerk himself off.

He was so damn close.

Reaching down he pressed the small button on the bottom of the vibe.

If he'd thought the first moan was loud the one that fell from his lips this time was practically a howl. Never in his life had he felt so filled.

He came as soon as the toy had "knotted" and his body shook as he came down in the delicious afterglow. He lay there gasping not caring about the fact he'd covered his own belly and chest in semen. He couldn't move even if he wanted to.

His body was still responding to the toy and he felt himself grow hard yet again. He wondered what it would feel like if Victor was between his legs right now.   
How would Victor moan?  
How would his lips taste?  
How would he moan?

Reaching down with shaking fingers he pressed the button. He missed the fullness the instant the knot faded, but he left the toy vibrating.

This time he touched himself thinking of Victor. There was a kind of perverted shame that upped the level of excitement. Victor was only a few rooms down, he could wake and here Yuri at any time. The thought alone drove him crazy and he gently started to fuck himself with the vibe, the whole time thinking of Victor. 

Once again he pressed the button.  
"Victor!"  
He all but shouted his alphas name as he came again.

He'd cum 3 times in the last half hour and finally he was starting to calm down. His eyes felt heavy and he had to force himself to stay awake long enough to slide the vibe out and turn it off. He dropped it next to his bed telling himself he'd need to clean it later that day.

His eyes drifted shut and soon he was fast asleep in his own cum, sweat and slick.


	4. 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fucking episode 11  
> COmpletelt ruined my flow...  
> God dammit
> 
> Sorry guys will do better!

Waking up the next morning Yuri groaned in disgust. Although his heat had faded at most completely so he was thankful for that at least, the he was in not so much.

Groaning again he struggled against the sheets that hung to his skin. His face burned red as he remembered what he'd done. Stupid heat!

Forcing himself out of bed he slipped a shirt and pj bottoms on to hide the mess before stripping the spoilt bedding.

Carrying the bundle he brought the whole mess with him into the bathroom.

*  
Having showered he felt somewhat more human. The clothes he'd washed the night before had been moved from the machine so without a second thought he put the sheets in.

Today he was going to be busy. 

Even though he still didn't know how to react around Victor he made the effort.  
Victor had him working out until his whole body throbbed and was screaming at him.

He'd thought things would be ok... that maybe they would work this out... until the Russian punk arrived.

*  
Yuri couldn't help but be jealous. Yurio had travelled all this way to chase Victor down for some promised routine, but Yuri was sure it was because the boy was hoping to present his second dynamic and be Victors mate. He wondered if Yurio thought himself a beta and that he'd already presented, if that was the case than Yuri couldn't help but feel a little bad for the boy.

Only that didn't last too long.

He'd tried to push past the fact Yurio had kicked in the toilet door and yelled at him when he'd been melting down.  
He tried to push past the way he'd kicked him at the ice rink.  
But what hurt the most was seeing how close the two Russians actually were. The smiles and easy conversation... that was supposed to be his spot. He knew he shouldn't complain, the way things were Victor wouldn't find out he was Yuri's alpha, until Yuri himself told him.

And so he threw himself into training.

*  
Fucking broccoli and noodles.  
Broccoli and noodles every damn day.  
Yuri would be glad when this was all over. He'd never hated a vegetable the way he'd come to hate broccoli.

He'd always loved food but it wasn't as if he hadn't been slimming down and suppressants seemed to help with the weight loss.

Slumped over the table watching Yurio and his alpha eating his favourite food was just too much.  
He hadn't meant to associate Eros with pork cutlets bowls but broccoli and noodles were messing with his head. He wanted to die the moment the words had left his mouth. If the two Russians hadn't thought him stupid before they certainly would now.

*  
Mari had asked him help prepare space for Yurio. He could see the glint in his sisters eyes, she clearly found something appealing in Yurio. First his alpha and now his sister... it was too much.

Arriving at the rink he finally took a moment to breathe. Every time he needed space he'd practice, practice until his feet bled and his mind settled.

He wanted to win. He wanted to get to know Victor, but at the same time he wanted to scream and push Victor away. He'd been so sure he was going to retire and then Victor came, came for him and through his life into chaos. 

And now Yurio wanted to take him away. Why was life so unfair. He could just tell Victor the truth, surely the Russian would stay then... but he didn't want Victor by his purely because of obligation.

So he bit his tongue and tried his hardest. He'd win with his own strength.

*  
He felt physically sick watching Yurio skate. The kid had so much more talent in his little finger than Yuri had ever had. He also had the confidence and looks. Yuri felt like he'd already lost.

Stepping on the ice he tried to calm his spinning mind. Minako had helped him until early in the morning. Trying to teach the omega how to be more feminine, after all Victor really was like the playboy and he the girl playing hard to get.

He wanted to seduce his alpha and make him proud.

And then he actually did it. Standing on the podium with Victor was awkward. Yurio had already taken off and he felt bad for the kid. A 23 years old beating a 15 year old felt wrong. But then again the age bracket for Seniors meant that's the way things had to be.

That night when he crawled into bed he could still feel the warmth of Victor against him. His mind was racing and his omega was craving Victors touch. He wondered if it would feel like that every time, he wondered if Victor felt it too.


	5. 5

Even as the days passed he still couldn't forget Victors warmth. It made him feel so confused, so he pushed Victor away. Ignored all his advances until it came to ahead and he found himself sitting and talking with Victor on the beach.

It felt like the conversation where Victor had asked about Yuri's past. Yuri had hated it, being put on the spot like that and then Victor had to bring up his first girlfriend. It fucking hurt. And now having Victor ask what kind of relationship he should have with Yuri. Well that hurt even more.

Even before he knew Victor was his mate he'd always wanted to know him. Know the true Victor that no one else saw but he'd never been brace enough to try. So now he would tell Victor a thousand times if he needed, that all he wanted was Victor to be himself!

Victor seemed so confused by his words and wondered if Victor had spent so long in front of the camera he didn't know who he was now that he wasn't.

*  
The first step back towards the Grand Prix would be The Chugoku, Shikoku, and Kyushu Championship.

He'd prayed not to draw lot one. But god hadn't answered. He felt so out of place being 6 years older than the other 3 competitors! He wondered if they'd even presented yet.

One kid named Minani seemed pretty intent on him and Yuri didn't know what to make of it. It was like the boy wouldn't stop until he forced himself to present to Yuri... even if that was impossible. So he'd pushed the boy away, which only made him alpha disappointed. Did Victor want Minami to be Yuri's mate? The thoughts left him so impatient.

He wanted to show off his skating, show Victor how much he could grow but instead he found himself having fun and not even caring he'd smacked face first into the rink wall. 

He hoped the teen competitors would see something they liked in his skating and make it there own. If this was his last season he wanted to leave them some small bit of knowledge.

That night he'd stayed up with Victor discussing all the ways he'd messed up and how to rectify. His head was still tender but at least he hadn't broken his nose. So he pushed back the pain.

Yuri loved the way Victor talked about skating. He loved the facial expressions he'd make without even realising, the way his voice would rise and fall when describing a jump. He was actually starting to fall for his alpha.

*  
Rolling over Yuri grabbed his phone. In one week he'd be standing on the ice in Beijing. He felt sick. Images of last year played over and over in his mind. Replacing his phone he pulled the blankets over his head and let himself fall back to sleep.

His dreams weren't any better. He fell and he fell. Victor yelled at him and was disgusted. He'd just started crying when he awoken.  
Drenched in sweat he tried to take a few deep breaths.

His body felt shaky like he was going into heat again. He frowned the rod was supposed to last longer than this. Reaching out again he grabbed his phone, before calling his doctor to make an appointment.

When he'd headed down to the kitchen Victor was already there. He'd tried to ask Yuri if he wanted breakfast but Yuri was already heading for the front door. Yuri could tell Victor was waiting for him to invite him so left without saying goodbye. He still had a fair amount of time before he was due at the clinic but he couldn't stay near Victor at the moment.

So he walked slowly, forcing back the desire to run back to Victor. It terrified him that the suppressant had already started to fade, it was like his body was betraying him.

*  
Arriving at the clinic he was already starting to leak slick. His whole body was burning and his mind spinning. Fortunately he'd walked slow enough that he didn't have to wait too long to be called in.

The physician seemed just as confused about why the rods effectiveness had faded so fast. He took bloods wanting to look at Yuri's hormone levels. His best guess was that having Victor so close all the time was driving Yuri's body into over drive. He recommended that Yuri have his rod removed permanently at the end of December or Yuri would run the risk of permanent sterility.

Kids? Kids with Victor? Would Victor even want kids? Was he good enough for Victor to have kids with?

He almost panicked at the thought and forced himself to calm down. He reminded himself he wasn't the same omega he was when Victor had arrived. He was Eros! The most beautiful pork cutlet bowl in the world!

After replacing the rod he was given another shot of suppressants and told not to train for today. He nodded thanking the physician.

By the time he got home he still found himself feverish. Avoiding Victor he climbed onto his bed.

*  
Waking up he was barely feverish but more than a little sexually frustrated. 

Sliding from the bed he once again found himself seeking relief from the vibrator he'd stashed again.

He wasn't as slick this time so he was forced to open himself up. The sensation was awkward but not completely displeasing. He hadn't done this since Victor had caused his heat months ago.

He moaned when his fingers brushed against his prostate, gently rubbing against the sensitive area until he started producing more slick. Rolling over he got on all fours facing away from the door. He'd read that this was how a good omega was supposed to present themselves to there alpha. Shivering with need he teased his quivering hole with the tip of the vibe. 

As the vibe slipped in he couldn't help but moan. He wondered why he'd taken so long to do this again.   
Gently he fucked himself with the toy, part of him wanted this over as soon as possible but the other part desired more.

He was so lost in the moment he didn't hear the door slide open. He didn't know he was giving Victor the show of his life.

His breathing fell in short pants and he knew he was close. Sliding a sticky finger along the base he pushed in the button causing the toy to knot. He came with Victors name on his lips. His whole body shook and he didn't realise he was still repeating Victors name.

He thought he heard his door move and snapped out the moment. He moved to fast and fell on his arse, pushing the vibe deeper. His heart was pounding but the door was shut. He scolded his over active imagination. But now he was to scared to enjoy the sensation of the vibrations.

He pulled the vibe out and turned the base to off. He was still semi hard but it had taken the edge off. Grabbing his shirt he wiped up the mess before flopping back onto the bed. 

*  
When he woke up later the fever had passed completely, he sighed in relief. Gathering his ruined bedding he dumped it in the wash before grabbing the vibe and a change of clothes and heading to the shower.

Showered and changed he looked at the time, it was only just 6pm so he decided to try going for a jog. He walked into the kitchen and saw Victor jump. Quickly he told his coach he was going out and Victor said nothing as he left.

It felt good to feel the impact of the pavement on his sneakers feet but he was curious about Victor. Was it because he didn't invite him to this mornings appointment? He wound up working himself up so much that he headed up to the Ice Castle to practice jumps.

They say that omegas have extra stamina so they can handle being pregnant and rough bouts of heat, to Yuri it was the only good thing about being an omega. Nothing felt better than landing jumps. He knew he tended to mess them up in competition so any chance he could get to practice was never wasted. Victor didn't know but Yuri had been practicing his quad flips. He knew Victor had only seen him do that one in Stay by Me, in the video the triplets took. He'd never really asked him about why he'd skated that routine and Yuri wondered if maybe it was a sore point. But still he practiced and practiced.

In Beijing he'd make Victor proud!

*  
The lead up to Beijing was a little awkward. Victor had taken to touching him more and more, openly flirting with him in front of his family and he didn't know how much more the could take. 

His doctor had called him and confirmed that Yuri's hormones were indeed in over drive which meant this rod would last even shorter than the one it'd replaced.   
He'd be lucky if it held out for the next two months. 

Once again he found himself trying to figure out the relationship between him and Victor. He'd gotten to know the man so well but at the same time he was still a mystery in so many ways. If he wanted to see where this went then he'd actually have to bite the bullet and talk to Victor. But that would have to wait until after Beijing.

When these thoughts finally left him alone at night his dreams were still haunted by images of Victor leaving. Each night he'd wake up time and time again panicked over the fact Victor wanted to leave him. In the end he felt more than a little exhausted and pretty much passed out on the flight over.


	6. 6

Beijing had so far only added to Yuri's worries. He'd been enjoying a nice night out with Victor when Phichit had joined them, well that it had been fine it was when everyone else showed up that things were awkward.

Ciao Ciao and Victor got into some sort of drinking contest which resulted in a very naked Victor wiggling up against Yuri's side, completely oblivious to just how hard Yuri was having to fight to keep his composure.

He was more than a little bit ashamed as Phichit helped him redress Victor. It wasn't that he hadn't seen Victor naked before but the fact they were in public. Still he was grateful Phichit was there to help.

Bidding goodnight to the other skaters Phichit and Yuri were forced to half carry Victor back to the hotel. It was slow going as Victor kept insisting he was perfectly fine and wanted to keep drinking.

This "perfectly fine" was proven a lie when they'd dumped him on his bed and Victor had fallen asleep instantly.

Even though it was late both Yuri and Phichit wanted to catch up. Phone calls, Skype and texts were fine and all but it's nothing compared to hanging out with your best mate.

Ignoring the snoring Victor they sat side by side on Yuri's bed and just chatted about everything and anything. Well mostly. Somehow Phichit always seemed to redirect things back to Victor and Yuri couldn't help sigh every time.

Phichit knew he was an omega. He was the only skater who did. Yuri hadn't planned on telling him but after a night out and not remembering at all what happened, he'd been forced to admit he was an omega and drinking on suppressants equaled memory loss. After that Phichit hadn't asked him out for drink again.

Phichit asked him all sorts of questions about what it was like to be so close to Victor and if he'd triggered a heat? It seemed to Yuri that Phichit had already decided they belonged together and would probably plan the whole wedding so he was forced to lie that Victor wasn't his alpha.

Phichit looked genuinely disappointed and Yuri felt like crap for it. He'd always loved Phichit's over the top enthusiasm. He tried to redirect the conversation but it was a little awkward and in the end Phichit left.

*  
Yuri had been hiding in the bathroom. His nerves had left him a vomiting wreck and his mind had cruelly replayed images of all his failures. Forcing himself up and out the bathroom he left to rejoin the others.

Even though he knew Chris was going to be there he still wasn't prepared. Ever since he'd met Chris the man had been handsy and Yuri's skin always prickled with disgust where ever he touched. He wondered if it was in response to another alpha, not his own, touching him. Whatever it was he hated it.

Finally it was his turn on the ice. He was going to prove Chris's words wrong. He didn't care if the whole world hated him. In a few months everyone would know the truth! Victor was his!

Linking their fingers together he told Victor "don't ever take your eyes off me" before skating away to show just how much he loved him. 

His was proud of his routine! His mind filled with Victor and he'd beaten his personal best! He loved how proud his alpha seemed.

But that feeling soon sunk when he watched Chris skate. Yuri knew he was beaten by Chris's sexual charm. Hell it was practically masturbation on ice. But still he'd taken first place. He'd never been in first place! 

*  
That night Victor took Yuri out trying to settle his nerves, but Yuri only fell apart further. All he could think was he was going to fail so badly tomorrow and then Victor would quit. The little confidence he'd built up crumbled and he found he couldn't sleep at all.

He'd tried to hide the fact he hadn't slept but between that and nerves he found he couldn't even open his bottle of water. Victor saw right through him and next thing he knew the two of them were curled up on the mattress with Victor snoring softly.

When Victor's alarm went off Yuri cursed it. He hadn't managed to sleep at all and he felt physically ill at the prospect of skating. He knew he'd fail.

He tried to settle his nerves, watching the other skaters routines but it was no use and he let Victor drag him down to the parking garage.

He didn't even know how he was still standing and when the crowd roared his heart stopped.  
"Don't listen!"  
Yuri panicked. Victor didn't even believe in him. Suddenly he wanted nothing to do with Victor. He needed space. He was an omega with and alpha who had no faith. It fucking hurt.

And then Victor shattered his heart. The words he feared had fallen from his lips. God why couldn't Victor understand.   
He hadn't meant to yell at Victor but his heart over ruled his emotions. Yuri turned and left with Victor walking just behind him.

It was painful.

This wasn't what he wanted.

*  
Blowing his nose he let the tissue drop. He didn't want things to be like this before his performance. Poking Victors head he then gently patted his part and skated off.

Even if Victor was stupid and lacking he was still Yuri's alpha. It wasn't a perfect routine but he was still doing better than he expected. He wondered if his omega was messing with his emotions and blowing things out of proportion. 

He knew Victor wouldn't expect the quad flip. He knew Victor had only seen him do it once and even then that wasn't in person. And so he'd gone for it, he'd stuffed the landing but it had had enough rotations, he only hoped Victor wouldn't be mad. 

Skating over all he could think was hopefully Victor would catch him when he jumped! He never expected to be kissed for his efforts. Much less in front of thousands of eyes. But he was thrilled.

*  
He was beyond tired as he let Victor lead him back to their hotel room. His lips still tingled from the kiss and Yuri found himself wanting more.

He was staggering by the time they actually made it into the room and fell down on his bed less than gracefully. Holding his eyes open seemed like too much work but Victor seemed to have other ideas. 

Sitting back up he watched as Victor unlaced his trainers before pulling them and his socks off. God his feet were tender.   
"Lift your hips up for me"  
Yuri was confused but then realised Victor intended to strip him before letting Yuri sleep.

He hadn't meant to moan as Victors finger tips brushed against his hips but it felt so good. With one fluid movement Victor had stripped them off. He paused a moment before pulling on Yuri's shirt.

Yuri's omega shivered under the gaze of his alpha. Reaching out his fingers were shaking, pushing back his nerves he slid his fingers through Victors hair until they rested on the back of his head. He pulled Victor in for a kiss.

It was soft and gentle and sweet, a beginners kiss. Pulling back he could see the surprise of Victors face. He felt a thrill. 

Pulling Victor back with him Yuri squirmed under his alpha. Victor was now kissing him back and Yuri felt like this was all a dream. Unashamed he angled his hips up to grind against Victor. Only a few hours ago this man had shattered his heart and now Yuri wanted him to put the pieces back together.

Stripping off his jacket and shirt Yuri whined at Victor for breaking contact. He could feel himself starting to grow slick.  
He moaned into Victors mouth as he felt Victors fingers running over the waistband of his underwear.  
"Yuri are you an omega?"

His heart stopped and Victor pulled away and sat down next to him. Head in hands.

"I'm sorry I kept it from you. I didn't want to be defined by it" and I didn't want you to know... but that bit went unsaid.

"Have you presented?"  
"Yes but I don't know who my alpha is..." another lie. He didn't want Victor to feel forced  
"When I was 13 Minako took me to a skating competition and I went into heat there. She was so panicked... but you know what it's like when there's hundreds of people at a competition... anyone could be your mate"  
Victor nodded.  
"I still don't see why you couldn't tell me. With the extra stamina we could have totally changed the routine to maximise on it even more"

Yuri frowned. Trust Victor to be thinking of skating at a time like this.

"Victor stop thinking, I'm ok with this if you are..."

Victor turned to him and looked at him like he was insane.  
"Yuri in an alpha I could get you pregnant and then when you did find your alpha what would they think"  
Yuri flinched.  
Turning his left arm toward Victor, he took Victors fingers and ran them over the slightly raised rod.  
"It's a slow release contraceptive and suppressant"  
Victor nodded before pulling his fingers back. Yuri thought he was going to pull back completely but instead his hand went up to cup Yuri's face before leaning into kiss him.

Yuri melted under Victors touch. Part of him thought he shouldn't be doing this but his omega was stripping away rational thought.   
"Move back"  
Yuri slid back to the centre of the bed while Victor stripped his underwear, pants and shoes. 

His eyes widened, it felt like he was seeing Victor for the first time all over again. He ground down against the bed. Desperate for relief.

Victor however took his time crawling across the bed and over Yuri. Kissing him deeply Victor rubbed Yuri's erection and the omega almost came on the spot. Desperate not to be the one to cum first Yuri reached up and tentatively took Victors erection into his hand.  
"Yuri..."  
He loved the way Victor moaned his name. He wondered how Victor would look when he came apart completely.

Victor sat back and pulled Yuri up to they were chest to chest, erections rubbing together. It was a little awakened but Victor slid his fingers down, scooping at the slick leaking from Yuri. When he felt it was enough he coated both their erections with the fluid.

Yuri was shaking so close to the edge. Victor devoured his mouth hungrily while jerking then both off together. Neither could last long and came within seconds of each other. Yuri slumped agains Victor and it took the alpha a second to realise Yuri had fallen asleep against him.


	7. 7

Only they didn't.

Instead that night passed with gentle kisses that sooner rather than later became hungry and desperate.

It'd only been a couple of days but the separation had left Victor hungry. He threw away his reservations and Yuri submitted. He couldn't say no to Victor when it seemed he wanted him so much. Once again Yuri found himself questioning his resolve.

Victor was a gentle lover. He knew Yuri wasn't experience, not that he was that experienced either. He gentle stripped Yuri's clothes layer by layer, kissing the flesh left naked in there wake.

He opened Yuri like he was made of tissue paper and would tear if he moved wrong in the slightest manner, it was frustratingly slow.

Sliding up he kissed Yuri deeply, looking him in the eyes. It was his way of asking if Yuri was still ok. Yuri moaned and arched up, and Victor pushed forward.

Yuri moaned clenching the sheets with his sweaty hands. His eyes went wide and his heart was pounding. He had submitted to his alpha and it felt amazing.

Victors slow pace soon increased and both were desperate and shaking as they chased release.  
"I'm going to knot you"

Yuri panicked but before he could object he felt Victor swell. It was beyond amazing and the toy was nothing in comparison to the pleasure Victor was giving him.

He felt no shame as he came across both of their stomachs.

No that shame wasn't felt until the next morning.

*  
He'd never seen Victor's face so relaxed. It hurt Yuri to the point tears started to slide down his face. He ignored the pain in his hips and slid from the bed.

Heading for the bathroom, the first thing he check when he was inside was his neck. He'd feared Victor had gotten carried away but melted in relief finding himself not marked.

Last night shouldn't have happened. How was he supposed to tell Victor they needed to part ways now!

So he threw himself into training. Practicing his quad flip over and over, but only landing it a few times. He and Victor worked to improve the routine. Even if he skated perfectly he'd still fall short of JJ. He hated the idea. He wanted gold. He wanted to retire a winner for both their sakes.

*  
Even though he'd tried to sleep on the flight it hadn't happened, so landing in Barcelona he'd been left extremely jet-lagged.

He'd agreed to meet up with Phichit and go sightseeing, telling himself he was only going to take a nap. Instead he slept most of the day's remainder away.

Victor wasn't there when he woke up and something inside him panicked. Searching social media he found photos of Victor at the pool with Chris. He pushed down his jealousy and scrolled further through. Everyone was out making the most of it while he was here in bed.

The images of last years failures flashed through his mind. He needed Victor.

As if by magic Victor appeared moments later, with Chris. Both of them seemed to find it hilarious to jump on him while being cold and wet.

Victor started kissing and licking at him so Chris made himself scarce. Pushing the alpha off he told Victor to go shower before pulling the covers over his head. He needed to man up!

*  
Practice went well even though he didn't practice the flips and he found the courage to even ask Victor to take him sight seeing.

It was fun to begin with, well until they started shopping. Victor was brutal. He wanted to go into every shop, see and touch everything. Soon Yuri collapsed on the nearest bench. This was more exhausting than training.

Yuri was humiliated and embarrassed when Victor noticed a bag was missing. Yuri's nerves snapped it was merely a bag of nuts but that was besides the point. Finally he let Victor drag him away.

To Yuri it felt awkward. He tried to ask the alpha about his birthday but Victor hadn't helped with present ideas, instead he'd offered him hot wine.

He ignored the gaze Victor was giving him, instead searching for what would be the perfect present for the Russian.

He didn't know what drew him to the jewellery store. Only that he desperately felt the answer he was seeking would be found here.

Pushing aside his nerves he strode confidently to the counter, almost immediately finding what he was looking for.  
2 matching gold rings. Something about them screamed Victor and he soon found himself purchasing one. He couldn't afford both, even if he did hate the idea that someone out there would have the matching one to his alpha.

But Victor then chose to come forward, he brought the matching partner outright. He'd almost forgotten how rich Victor actually was.

Leaving the shop they continued to walk, Yuri's eyes once again seeking something he wasn't sure about.

Then they found the cathedral and once again Yuri found himself draw by something. Slipping in they moved to the back ignoring the choir.

It was almost like a proposal even though he told Victor the rings were purely for good luck. It was a promise to be strong until the end. The moment was like something from a movie and when Victor kissed his lips he knew the man had the wrong idea.

*  
Walking the streets they came across Minako and Mari who seemed to be spying, quickly they were asked for a favour. They wanted to see Yurio again and meet Otabek.

Somehow it ended up that the 6 of them were seated around the table and Chris and Phichit had appeared as well, the girls wept in happiness.

They talked about all sorts of things and eventually it came back around to last years banquet. Yuri could only remember the start of it when he'd felt so alone and then Ciao Ciao had left him. He didn't understand the looks he was given until they broke the news that the night had been a bit more eventful.

Even with the photos he struggled to believe it. He scolded himself, telling himself he should have known better than to drink on suppressants.

When they told about how he'd thrown himself at Victor and begged the Russian to come coach him he wanted to sink into the ground. He didn't think he could get more embarrassed until Phichit saw the rings.

His heart sank to his toes when Phichit announced to everyone that he and Victor had gotten married. Despite his protests everyone else seemed to just expect it. 

Victor instead told the group it was an engagement ring, that they'd marry when Yuri won gold. Everyone snapped. Victor had stepped on the landmine and in that instance they all remembered why they were there. JJ sprouted some nonsense but no one had time for him, instead they left all with the intention of getting a good nights sleep before tomorrow's competition.

*  
Even though Victor had kissed the ring Yuri didn't feel it. He'd caught the playboy and was soon to throw him away. His thoughts soon wandered to everyone else and his Eros suffered. It wasn't until he finished he realised he hadn't thought of Victor that way, instead his body had been going through the motions. He fell apart.

But still Victor took him to the kiss and cry, but it felt like an act. Yuri forced him out his mind and focused on Phichit. Phichit had the age and talent. He could would go far.

Yurio was beyond beautiful. His agape was almost unearthly. Transfixing everyone.

As Yuri watched Victors facial expressions he wondered if this was payback for not thinking of Victor while skating Eros.

His insecurities left him raw. He knew he was sulking but he'd brought it upon himself and once again he'd found himself 4th.  
He couldn't help but seem himself in JJ which only worsened his mood.

They all knew it was time to retire. Chris, Yuri and Victor needed to step away and let the next generation forge the way. 

Tonight would be the tonight he told Victor.

*  
Yuri acted like nothing was wrong, he smiled and laughed for Victor. Like a puppet on a string. Even when they fell into bed together he gave himself over to Victor completely.

While Victor showered Yuri redressed. He had to do this now. Before tomorrow, before Victor thought that Yuri's potential win would actually lead to something.

Victor was still smiling as he sat across from Yuri. But Yuri couldn't return it.  
"After the final. Let's end this."

Victors face fell for a second. For a moment he could tell Victor thought him to be joking.  
"Victor in retiring tomorrow. I know my alpha is now and I'm going to be with him after this"

Victors face fell and tears began to swell. 

He'd done it. A few more sentences and it would be all over. Victor would be free from his obligations.

"Victor, you saw Yurio and Otabek today, even Chris tried to cling on but fell short in their shadow. It's time for all of us to move on. To find a life outside of skating... I release you of your obligation"

Getting up Yuri left the room, he wanted to skate but that wasn't an option. So instead he walked and walked.

Finally he turned back. He felt like a weight had been lifted. Victor would finally have a chance at a real life. A chance to discover who he was outside of skating. 

Yuri looked down at the gold band and slipped it off. Some good luck charm. And yet when he tried to throw it away he couldn't. Part of him hoped that some day the rings would bring them back together.

*  
Standing in the elevator it felt like a lifetime before the doors opened. He dragged his feet as he walked back to the room.

Victor had gone. Yuri sighed. He felt miserable and conflicted all over again.

Scolding himself he kicked off his shoes and climbed into bed.


	8. 8

Victor hadn't returned while Yuri had been asleep. Part of him worried but if he was to back down now that would only cause Victor more pain. Instead he dressed for the day and headed down to have breakfast.

He'd been lost in his own world and hadn't realised Phichit had been trying to get his attention. He smiled so he wouldn't worry his friend and told him he was still sleeping. Phichit didn't seem to buy it but didn't press, instead he asked where Victor was. Yuri shrugged, it's not like he had any clue but before he answered Ciao Ciao showed up telling Phichit it was time to leave.

Yuri ate his breakfast in silence, not tasting it at all. When he was done he double checked he had everything and walked over to the rink.

*  
Yuri could tell by the way everyone looked at him, they were puzzled by the lack of Victor. He pushed it out of his mind and started warming up. In some ways it felt like a fog had been lifted from his mind. He'd started off feeling alone, learn to love and finally learnt to stand on his own two feet. No matter what happened today he'd stand on his own.

It wasn't until he was walking down the corridor toward the rink he came across Victor. The tension in the air was thick enough that you could practically see it. He stood firm. Victor could hate him if he needed, after all this was all for Victors good.

*  
Stepping onto the ice his mind felt calm. His body was relaxed and he felt no pressure.  
This would be the last time he ever skated competitively and the last time he'd skate with Victor as his coach.   
He'd slipped the ring back on this morning to avoid questions, but now he found he felt nothing about that either.

Instead he skated. Skated using the love he felt for Victor and the love he'd found for himself. 

This would be the first and last time he'd skate the routine perfectly. Not once did he falter, he truly felt free on the ice. He'd even added extra jumps because he was enjoying the sensation so much.

Tears streamed down his face as he skated off. Victor had moved to comfort him but Yuri kept him at an arms length. His mind was reeling and he missed hearing his own score, but it didn't matter. Everything was over now and all he wanted was to go home.

It was as he'd expected. Yurio placed first and Otabek second. He'd placed third. He would have been second if he hadn't messed up his Eros with stupid thoughts.

Oh well. What's done was done.

*  
Yuri left pretty much as soon as he could. Heading to the hotel he packed all his things, and moved them into the room Mari and Minako shared. The girls were both proud of him but he didn't want to hear it. It wasn't gold. He'd failed his alpha again. 

He would have changed his flight back to match theirs two if it wasn't for he fact he'd still have to see Victor when he returned to Yu-topia to collect all his things. 

He wanted to cry but each time he felt the need he'd dig his nails into his palms. This was for Victor!

He knew it and he still felt like shit. 

So once again he found himself outside walking.

*  
In the end Phichit had found him. He'd walked down to the rocky shore and was sitting with his back against the wall just staring at the water.

The beach reminded him of that day when Victor had taken him to the beach. It was so long ago. He allowed himself the luxury of tears now no one was around to see.

Phichit didn't say anything, instead he sank down next to Yuri. Yuri tried to wipe the tears away but more flowed free. Finally Phichit broke the silence.  
"What happened with Victor?"  
Yuri stared at him and sighed deeply.  
Now the competition was over he could finally talk to Phichit freely, so he explained everything.  
How Victor was his alpha.  
How he'd lied about it.  
How he'd wanted Victor to get to know him as Yuri and not as his mate.  
How he'd realised Victor needed to take time and figure out his life without skating.  
How he'd still fallen in love with Victor.  
How he'd given in and submitted while lying to Victor.  
How last night he'd ended it all.  
How he'd told him he'd found his alpha and wanted to be with them after the final.  
He also broke down and admitted to Phichit he had to go off suppressants at the end of the month or risk going sterile.

He felt like shit laying all this on his friend but for all his big talk of standing on his own, in this moment he couldn't.

Phichit took a while to reply. He told Yuri he didn't know if it was the right thing to do as Victor clearly adored him, but he could also see that Victor would have to figure out his own future so promised to keep it a secret.

They say there for a long while not saying anything.

*  
At the banquet Yuri stuck close to Phichit. He wouldn't make a fool of himself again. There was no crazy dance party and Yuri ignored the fact that Victor had turned up with a woman on his arm. They'd all dragged him aside and asked a million questions about it, he told them all the same thing: now the final was over there relationship as student and coach was over too and Victor was free to do what he wanted with his life.

Yurio was the only one who put his feelings into words. Yuri had expected too but it didn't mean the right hook the teen had thrown hurt any less. After that he excused himself.

Once again he told himself that this was for Victor.

*  
They didn't talk on the flight back, Yuri slept off and on but remained as if he slept right through. He hurt. He didn't want to part with Victor. Once again he was wavering. Once again he had to tell himself it was for Victor.

Arriving in Japan he was mobbed, reporters all wanted to know what was next for him. He didn't answer. He didn't know. Victor charmed the media so Yuri left ahead of him. 

It was so different to the last one he'd flown into Japan. Victor wouldn't hold him now.

*  
Victor stayed for another 2 weeks. He seemed to want to talk to Yuri but every time he saw him he'd clamp up. The whole family was waiting for the explosion that never came.

Instead one day Victor announced his attention to return to Russia. He asked that he leave some things behind until he was set up there. Yuri's parents agreed.

And then he and Makkachin were gone.

*  
Yuri had his rod removed the same day. His emotions left him a mess and his heat doubly so.

He'd done it.  
Victor was gone.

He spent the week relying on sleeping pills. Only staying awake for a few hours at a time. He missed Victor more and more and wondered what the man was doing.

Finally he gave in and looked up Victors social media accounts. Victor had blocked him on all of them. It hurt so fucking much that he thought his heart would stop.

A name search pulled up multiple articles about Victors return to Russia. Though it said nothing of Victors intentions the photos spoke volumes to Yuri. The shine from Victor's eyes were gone, he looked tired and run down. It only made Yuri feel worse.

In the end he had to force himself to stop looking. He'd wanted the best for his alpha but he'd ruined him instead.

It wasn't until 3 weeks after Victor had left that Yuri finally left the house.

*  
Yuko didn't say anything. She didn't know the details but she knew Yuri needed to sort his own head space out.

He tried to skate the way he did before Victor but couldn't remember it. Instead he found himself practicing quad flip after quad flip. 

By the next week he could land them perfectly. But that only made things worse.

As he skated he wondered what to do next. Everyone was moving on without him. Hell even Ciao Ciao and Minako seemed to be getting closer and Yuri wondered if they'd end up together. Once again it felt like he was being left behind and he was terrified. 

He didn't want to work at the onsen and he didn't want to skate competitively, he also knew he didn't have the right mentality to coach. He felt completely lost.

*  
Coming home one day he paused at the entrance, dog prints ran criss cross. He sighed and slumped down against the entrance. Victor was here. That meant he couldn't go home. He was lost in thought when Makkachin launched himself at him. Letting out a surprised yelp he found himself pinned under the overly happy poodle. 

He couldn't bring himself to push Makkachin away, he'd missed him too much. Instead he pushed him off just enough to sit up and bury his face in his fur.

"Makkachin...!"  
Yuri's head shot up. His body began to burn. He shouldn't have stayed. Victor had sent him into heat again.

He tried to struggle to his feet but his body was demanding to be mated and wouldn't cooperate.

Moaning he fell back down awkwardly against Makkachin. Victor came running over. Yuri could feel him shaking him but couldn't reply. He didn't trust himself not beg the alpha to take him right there.

His face burned even hotter as Victor lifted him up and to his chest. He breathed in the alphas sent. It was amazing! He wanted to be covered in it from head to toe.

He heard Victor talking to his mother but he couldn't make the words out. Instead he burrowed in closer to Victors chest.

He felt Victor start walking again and realised he was being carried upstairs.

*  
Victor laid him out on the bed and stripped him down to his underwear. The coolness felt wonderful against his burning skin.   
"Yuri where are your suppressants?"

He could only shake his head before moaning and curling into a ball. He wanted Victor so damn bad it physically hurt.  
"Yuri? Come on you need to tell me how to help you..."

Trying to form words was hard but he still managed to tell Victor to leave him, his mother arrived before Victor could protest and soon she'd shooed him from the room. Only Victor didn't leave. Instead he sunk down leaning against he wall next to the open door.

Yuri's mother was talking to Yuri. He sympathised knowing Yuri wouldn't want to be seen like this. He'd been thinking about leaving when he caught words of the conversation they were having  
"... you should just tell him..."  
"... no... I won't be the new shackle around his neck"  
Victor was puzzled. Even if your had been panting and the words course and dry he was sure he'd heard right  
"Yuri you're suffering because you're denying your alpha... we can all see you adore him... it's not fair to keep pushing him away..."  
"Victor needs to figure out his life without skating... I'm pushing him away for his sake... I'm sorry but can you please leave..."

A few seconds later Yuri's mother emerged before sliding the door shut behind her. She'd seen Victor still sitting there, clearly confused by every thing. She didn't want to go against Yuri's wishes but she didn't want Yuri to suffer anymore.


	9. Victor Listens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hiroko and Victors conversation

Victor listens.

*  
It felt awkward as he sat across from Yuri's mother. His mind was still trying to process the conversation he'd over heard.

Placing a cup of tea in front of him, Yuri's mother sat down. He could already tell this was going to be a long story. 

Hiroko took a deep sip and sighed. She was tired of this. She was tired of her son trying to handle all the burdens of life by himself.

She started her story.

Yuri had always been a happy child, always loved life and was nice to everyone. Raising him had been easy in that respect, but at the same time he was much harder to raise than Mari.

Even as a child Yuri never complained so years passed by and they had no idea how cruelly their son had been bullied. I mean we all know kids can be shits but Yuri never let on how bad it was. 

But it by bit he began to change. 

He wouldn't go out with his friends instead opting to spend hours skating with Yuko. It was no secret he had a crush on her but he also never acted on it. They were grateful for everything Yuko had done for him. She'd got him interested in Victor in the first place, probably a case of wanting to have something to talk to her about, but it was still nice.

Vicchan was the first time Yuri ever asked for anything. His parents could hardly say no especially when he was such a selfless person. 

But that was getting off topic.

She told him how when Yuri was 12 turning 13, Minako had seen the bruises on him while he'd been at the studio and how he'd confessed that kids at school had pushed him down the stairs. She'd cried imagining the pain her son had been keeping a secret. Minako had promised to keep an eye on him and let her know if she saw any more but she never did. 

Minako knew about skating where as Hiroko had no clue, she wanted to do something for her son but didn't know what and that's when Minako brought up the fact the Grand Prix would be in Japan that year and she wanted to take Yuri. Together they'd organised everything in order to surprise him. 

Only things didn't go too well. That was the day Yuri had his first heat. Minako had called her in tears apologising over and over, in all the years she'd known Minako she'd never seen the woman like that.

She didn't care if her son was an omega, as long as he knew he was loved.

After that Yuri started to skate more and more, he wanted to know if his alpha was a skater and was determined to make it into that world and find out.

He hated being an omega though, he felt when people looked and talked to him that's all they saw so he started on suppressants regularly. 

Eventually Yuri finally got his chance and headed to Detroit. They'd all been so scare for him, his walls were already so high and he was no longer outgoing. But still he went.

Things seemed to be hard at first, he struggled to find any sort of balance between skating and college. She remembered how he'd been so excited when he first met Phichit. His first friend there. And finally Yuri seemed to be coming into his own.

That was until he made it to the Grand Prix. Vicchan had died and Yuri found himself doubting more and more in himself and that he'd find his mate again. Hell he'd even gone into heat. In the end he'd self destructed just in time to completely fail in the Grand Prix. She still remembered how his voice had shook on the phone and the way he'd apologised. It's broken her heart.

Not long after that Yuri had announced he was coming home. She couldn't have been happier. It'd been 5 long years after all. She'd talked to Yuri about what he wanted to do with his future and he'd been so lost and unsure. She loved watching him skate but didn't know if he could continue given his state of mind.

But then Victor had shown up.

Thee Victor. The man who'd been her sons inspiration for so many years. And Yuri seemed to come alive again.

The second he'd met Victor he'd realised he Victor was his alpha and he was terrified. He'd had to leave that night to prevent Victor from finding out he was in heat. That was the night his first rod had been put in.

She explained how he wanted to get to know Victor without the who alpha and omega situation affecting whatever sort of relationship would develop. To hear her son talking about letting someone in at all had made her so happy.

She told him he probably knew most of the middle part already, other than one piece of news she knew Yuri wouldn't have told him.

The fact that Yuri's hormones had gone into overdrive having his alpha so close. The rod that should have lasted 8 months barely lasted 6 and at the end of the year he'd have to stop contraceptives and suppressants or risk never being able to have children.

And yet he still fell in love with Victor. But the more he fell in love the more he realised he didn't want Victor to chose him without having a chance to forge a new path. He'd talked to her about his desire to retire and how after he did he'd turn his back on Victor. He'd let Victor find a new passion before admitting the truth. He didn't want to hold him back, she could see his point though. Victor had been skating so long and now he'd quit to coach time had moved on. He needed to move on in his own way.

She smiled sadly before reaching out and taking Victors hand.

I know you fought in Barcelona. We could all see it in the way you two interacted. It was then I realised Yuri had told you that he wanted to end things. Minako had called her worried about Yuri's mental state and she'd been forced to cover for the two of them. It hadn't been a great feeling but she'd hoped one day they'd be honest and tell Minako herself.

She'd seen the way Yuri had suffered when he came back. They'd all been so proud of him but it was like his heart had shattered. She'd wanted Yuri to talk to Victor before he'd left but Yuri was still serous about giving Victor his freedom.

He loved Victor so much he was willing to destroy himself for the sake of his alpha. 

*  
As Victor listened he didn't know what to say. Something's he knew but there was a lot he didn't. 

It took him a long moment before he could even form a proper thought, let alone a sentence.

Yuri had known the whole time.  
Yuri had lied the whole time.  
Yuri loved him the whole time.  
Yuri was the one destined for him.  
His mate was willing so fall apart so completely just so he might find a way to be happy?  
Yuri had always told him to just be himself... was that why?  
How would things have progressed if he'd realised earlier.

His mind was a mess. 

Yuri.

He knew he loved Yuri even before they're relationship turned sexual. He'd been intrigued by the omega at the banquet, he seemed to love life so much. He wondered if part of him deep down had known it that night, that Yuri was supposed to be his.

He was also confused. If Yuri had gone into heat around him shouldn't he have felt it. He couldn't remember that Grand Prix and Yuri had taken off right after meeting him... so that only left tonight... he would be lying if he said he hadn't wanted to touch the man but he'd been more concerned then anything. 

This was all too much. 

All of this could be sorted by talking things out properly with his omega.

Reaching out he drained the cup of now cold tea. He was more nervous now then he could remember ever being before.

He thanked Hiroko and left. Yuri needed him and that's what mattered most in this moment.


	10. 10

Yuri's body was burning. His omega was demanding to be mated.

His mother had given him sleeping pills which had helped, but only for a few hours. Now he was awake, desperately horny and Victor was sitting on the floor against his bed like it was the most natural thing in the world to do.

Moaning loudly he pushed off the blankets, having Victor so close was not helping at all.

Scrunching his eyes closed he tried to will himself back to sleep but instead he felt the bed dip and Victor placed his hand over Yuri's forehead, it felt amazingly cool.  
"Mnnm... Victor..."

Yuri moaned as Victor leaned in and kissed him, it tasted delicious. Part of him was still coherent enough to know he shouldn't be doing this, but that was soon stripped away by Victors eager kisses.

"Yuri... you're so perfect..."

Yuri's face reddened even more if that was possible. Slick leaked down his thighs and his erection throbbed demanding release.

"Yuri I'm going to help you calm down ok but then we need to talk..."

Yuri nodded, he would have pretty much agreed to anything Victor said as long as the man didn't stop touching him.

Licking a trail down his fevered body Victor took his time, driving Yuri completely mental. He thrust his hips up desperate for Victor to hurry up, be he didn't.

Finally Victor slid down his underwear. Yuri moaned as Victor ran his fingers over his erection, he wanted his alpha.

Moving around Victor settled between Yuri's legs and put them up over his shoulders, forcing his omega to slide down the bed. 

Victor was merciless as he licked and sucked as Yuri's slick. Yuri came on the spot. But Victor didn't stop and soon the omega was reduced to practically mewing for more.

"Fuck Yuri! I'm still mad you you know"

Slipping out from between his legs he heard Victor shuffling round. It wasn't soon before Victor was repositioned and pushing into Yuri.

Yuri almost shouted Victors name. His hands scrambled and clawed at the sheets. Sparks danced behind his eyelids. He didn't last long, cuming hard as Victor thrust in over and over.

He felt Victor pull him up and was too boneless to protest. He nuzzled into Victors neck as his alpha continued to thrust, when he felt Victor begin to knot he bit down hard on his alphas neck. He hadn't meant to but he'd never felt so fulfilled by his alpha.

Victor was speaking but Yuri couldn't hear, he'd cum again almost painfully as Victor had knotted. He felt Victors own mouth on his neck and gentle pressure before the sharpness of his teeth. He was too exhausted to move and left himself in Victors hands as his alpha laid him down.

*  
When he woke up his heat had settled and Victor was curled up next to him. His omega was temporarily sated but now Yuri was panicking. His wasn't what was meant to happen. Victor was supposed to be free!

He shifted towards the edge of the bed only to have Victor reach out and grab him by the arm. He felt himself be yanked back.

"Yuri... we need to talk..."

Victor shifted behind him and looped his arms around Yuri's waist. There was no way he could escape now.

"Victor let me shower!"  
"Nooo... not until you talk to me"

Yuri struggled against Victor but he got no where fast and slumped back into Victors hold.

"Why didn't you tell me Yuri?"

*  
Sighing Yuri didn't even bother trying to deny it. He'd tried so hard to push Victor away and now he was back here all over again.

"Why did you have to come back? You were supposed to be free from all this"  
Yuri bit on his lip and Victor snuggled closer.  
"Yuri... when I got back to Russia I realised there was no place for me there anymore. You were right it was time for all of us to retire and move on..."

Yuri closed his eyes. His omega was already starting to demand to be mated again. Turning his head he nuzzled against Victors neck.

"I found without you I was so lonely, even in Barcelona and you were by my side but it was like you were already preparing to leave me... guess you were"

Yuri flinched.  
"But still I found myself thinking only of you, but by the time we left you'd already shut me out all together. I was hoping Japan would be different but nothing changed. It felt like those months had meant nothing and now it was over the whole thing was a charade"

He felt Victor press a kiss to his forehead.

"It's like you've always been able to see through me, you even worked out that I needed a break from this world before I did. You did all this for me while breaking your own heart... you're such an idiot"

Yuri wriggled against Victor. His mind was starting to grow fuzzy and he could feel himself growing slick again.

"Yuri when I'm with you I feel like I'm home... I want to stay with you... so please let me...?"

Yuri pulled Victors arms off his waist and turned around so he was straddling Victors lap.

Gently he kissed Victor's forehead before he rested his own against it.  
"You're the one who sees right through me, even when you weren't looking at me you still saw through me... it hurt so much to hurt you but I didn't want to shackle you like skating had"

He drew back before pressing a kiss to Victors lips.

"I told myself over and over it was for your sake and time after time I found myself wavering... but I wanted you to find your own path without obligation. I don't regret not telling you I was your omega... I mean we got to know each other without the who destiny stuff..."

Before Yuri could continue Victor flipped him over and pinned him down.  
"I'm still mad at you... but at the moment you're talking too much... so just let me love you ok?"


End file.
